We compare and contrast our lives to total strangers and devalue ourselves for it. We compare ourselves to acquaintances and close friends, and devalue ourselves again. AND FOR WHAT FUCKING PURPOSE?
R U Ok Day is a great initiative. It can make someone feel not alone, it can start a conversation. But, as someone with generalised anxiety disorder and depression (and is prone to crying in public), I have some thoughts.
Ask me to do a hilarious blog post about a twenty-something’s struggle to do, well, anything and I’m golden but ask me to do something that may be slightly out of my comfort zone or what might be considered an “achievement” and I’ve tapped out before you’ve said “portfolio.”
Warning: may contain triggers for those who suffer anxiety or depression. This title is misleading; I suffer from an anxiety disorder. I am constantly under the pressure that I am a total failure and cannot do anything. It’s hard to fight against something that is all in your mind. No one is telling me I can’t; no one is telling me I am a loser. I am telling me all this. All day, every day for the last 24 years. That is a very difficult pathway to come off of. Something I realised today. There will be no point in my life where I became a perfect human and it will be all gravy. I will constantly struggle. Life is damn hard. I had no idea I would fall this hard. I never saw this coming. I am not alone. We all face different struggles. We face pain we did not expect. It is okay. Not everything can be fixed. But we can adapt and change. I have grown in many ways the last 5 years. I have shrunk into a strange little dark thing but I also fought against it and became a...