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Showing posts from October, 2014

What I have learned as a failure

Warning: may contain triggers for those who suffer anxiety or depression.
This title is misleading; I suffer from an anxiety disorder. I am constantly under the pressure that I am a total failure and cannot do anything. It’s hard to fight against something that is all in your mind. No one is telling me I can’t; no one is telling me I am a loser. I am telling me all this. All day, every day for the last 24 years. That is a very difficult pathway to come off of.
Something I realised today. There will be no point in my life where I became a perfect human and it will be all gravy. I will constantly struggle.
Life is damn hard. I had no idea I would fall this hard. I never saw this coming. I am not alone. We all face different struggles. We face pain we did not expect. It is okay. Not everything can be fixed. But we can adapt and change. I have grown in many ways the last 5 years. I have shrunk into a strange little dark thing but I also fought against it and became a better me. I …